My favorite TV show...

I won't go. I won't sleep. I can not breathe, until you're resting here with me.....

Roswell!

When Liz Parker (Shiri Appleby) is shot by a stray bullet in her family's restaurant, The Crashdown, in Roswell, NM Max Evans (Jason Behr) must make a life altering decision: save the girl he's secretly loved since first grade or protect his secret origins in outer space. Also featuring Colin Hanks, Brendan Fehr, Majandra Delfino and Katherine Heigl.

Roswell was my first... lots of things.

This was the first time I saw a show promo that made me so anxious for the fall premiere season that I WISHED for the end of summer. I've always been a tv hound, but this show was quite possibly the beginning of my downfall, otherwise known as my transformation into a couch potato.

Roswell was also the first time a show's fate ever stressed me out. When the WB canceled Roswell I cried. Seriously, I was 17 or 18. And now that I've typed that I realize how unbelievably pathetic that sounds. *cringe* Anyway, UPN saved this show and I was ecstatic. And then they canceled it after one season. I was too angry to shed any more tears.

That cancellation still stings today. Every fall season I get so excited when a show I love premieres, but I'm always very antsy that it'll get canceled too soon. I'm pretty sure that wounded distrust began here. Season 4 would have been amazing, but we'll never know!

This was also the first time I realized how great a truly amazing soundtrack could be. Everything from the theme ("Here With Me" by my beloved Dido) to every moody, depressing alternative female singer they used to punctuate teenage angst spoke to me. And when they put the series on dvd, even though they couldn't afford all of the songs on the original soundtrack, I think the team did a great job picking songs that carried the spirit of the show well.

I've also never been able to truly let this show go. Every now and then I bust out the dvds and have a Roswell marathon. I also shamelessly plug the show to friends (no takers yet, but soon... soon someone'll catch on to this fabulousness!) And I'm finally reading the books. I love a good, breezy YA escape and that's exactly what I get. I also love taking a mini vacation with a book that I can devour in a day of leisurely reading.

*sigh* I'm so nostalgic now... Looks like it might be time for another Max fest. Oh Jason Behr... how I love you!

Happy Birthday Sierra!

As you all know, I love my babies...
So here's a personal shot out to one of the coolest (the coolest!) little people I know.
::my namesake::

 

::my heart::

Just for you:



Love,

Titi Colie!

The Cold Blue Blood- book recommendation

Plot:
New York movie critic Mitch Berger goes to sleepy New England Dorset and falls in love with a secluded carriage house, where he plans to hide and grieve his wife's death. When there is a series of murders, surrounding Dorset's old moneyed elites, Mitch comes into contact with State Trooper Desiree Mitry, the highest ranking African American woman in the New England state police. They solve the mystery, fall in love, and Mitch's fool butt almost gets his ass killed!

This summer I decided to move away from all of the sci-fi, romance novels that I'd been consuming throughout the spring and move into mysteries. But not like creepy old man dead in the closet mysteries (I'll get to those soon enough), but cozy mysteries that are really interesting and fun to read, but not so much scary.

I started with Charlaine Harris' Real Murders.

Yea, you might remember her from the Sookie Stackhouse novels and True Blood. If you've read those novels then you know how quickly Harris becomes super annoying and the quality of the story begins to suffer. *cough*Dead and Gone*cough* She just has a way of turning okay characters into the most annoying people you could ever imagine reading. (By book 9 I hated Sookie almost as much as I hated Bella Swan). So I gave her Aurora Teagarden stories a try with more than a little trepidation. But, I have to say that the first and second books really weren't that bad. I'm currently going through that series (slowly) but I got sidetracked with Handler's Berger & Mitry mysteries.

The Cold Blue Blood by David Handler was recommended  on a message board/interracial fiction site. The series focuses on the developing relationship between Mitch and Des and, in my opinion, an inordinate amount of murders in such a small New England town.

So why am I recommending it?

Honestly, this shit is hilarious. Somehow Handler has a way of writing two characters who are just real enough that you think you might know someone like them, but just odd enough that you might not.

Mitch is like a "real life" version of The Critic . Fat, Jewish, totally nerdy, and only the tiniest bit pathetic. And not bald (plus!).

Des... Oh I just don't know how to describe her, but I'd love to see how Handler envisioned her. But in a word, she's AWESOME! even though she talks kinda funny...

Anyway, ch-ch-ch-check it out...

Dear Cold Case

You suck extra hard!

Give me back my Kat Miller:

This, by the way, is hot:

Let's go back to that.

...good day mate (or whatever)...

We all know that there are lots of foreign actors donning "American" accents on tv. Some people get all angsty about it, usually New Yorkers, oddly enough. I, however, think it's super freaking awesome. Especially the bad ones! Let' consider the players:

Alex O'Louglin: SEXY... oh, his accent... um, pretty decent actually, except sometimes you can tell that it's acting. Usually it's when he doesn't blend words together or cut off their endings in that very particular way that I love. It's hard to explain really. Well, that's not true. It's more like Americans are lazy (I mean this as a compliment) and "to" usually becomes "ta" as we blend it with the following or preceding words. So every time someone actually says "I want to go to the store" as opposed to "I wanta go..." they're either trying too hard or the accent is so fake... Either way, I love it.

Joseph Fiennes: Passable, mostly because he's doing the whole nondescript American accent that's always the easy way out in my opinion, but whatever.

Jonathan LaPaglia: Really good, but he has an odd way of speaking on Cold Case. It's not Boston. It's not New York. It's.... whatever, he's cute. It is what it is.

Yvonne Strahovski: Seriously... another Australian? (I kid I kid). Passable, but she does the kind of accent that you know isn't quite right but you put up with it anyway cause... well, fine... she's hot.

Jamie Bamber: He was damn good on BSG... Sure he had some slip ups every now and then, but very few as far as I could see. And he's hot. (Yes, there is a theme: Be pretty: no one cares if you sound like a muppet.)

Hugh Laurie: Motherphucken Flawless, mate! 

Who are your favorite pretend Americans?

...what a difference a curl makes...

On The L Word, Katherine Moennig was, quite possibly, the love of my life as sexy, horribly emaciated, womanizer Shane.  When that show ended, very unsatisfactorily I might add, I despaired about getting my weekly Shane Katherine fix.

So of course I was excited when I saw that she was cast on Three Rivers as Dr. Miranda Foster, with the oh so motherphucken gorgeous Alex O'Loughlin of Moonlight fame. (Man, I miss that show!) The season premiere last week was... meh. Whatever. I wasn't surprised. I wasn't in love. And while this show is likely to make a second season it's almost certain that I'll only watch to drool over Alex. I'd hoped to salivate over Katherine as well until:

 WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON WITH HER HAIR!?

Oh my god. I really have nothing else to say. No review of the show. No critiques really about the plot or acting. I can't even muster a huzzah! at the fabulous Alfre Woodard.

All I have to offer is a deep, heartfelt plea for the hair and makeup team on Three Rivers to fix this situation.

STAT!

FlashForward... plot hole?

So I've taken a couple of tentative sips of the FlashForward kool-aid and I'll probably drink the rest of my cup. I like the show. I like the cast (Gabrielle Union AND Gina Torres showed up tonight *squee*). It works for me.

But as I was watching tonight I just kept looking at some of the characters and thinking "what the fuck!?"

Let me explain...

In the the second episode, the FBI starts trying to figure out why the blackout happened and what it means. They're working almost exclusively from Mark Benford's flash about his crazy idea/suspect/miscellaneous shit board. Yea, as you can tell I'm not a fan of that plot device. It's super annoying. But whatevers... So, the team is working off of the premise that if Mark encounters something that was on his board then it must be relevant to the Blackout. And as they encounter clues they put them on a board.

See where I'm heading?

Yea, they're building the fucking board that Max sees in his flash. So everything might not be pertinent, but they might have thought it was at one time or another. So it ended up on the board. *scratching head* Aren't they just willing the future to happen?

Ok, let me keep explaining...

The big drama from last week on has centered around the oh-so-sexy Agent Demetri Noh's  (John Cho) admission that he didn't see anything in his flash. He takes that to mean that he's dead by then. This theory is only further strengthened when he meets another person who didn't have a flash who is then shot to death shortly thereafter. (ooops, spoiler alert) He's all aggro about that, and rightly so cause dying sorta sucks. But he gets even more angsty after he gets a call from a mysterious stranger (the sexy-voiced Shohreh Aghdashloo) who relays that, in her flash, she saw intelligence that he is murdered around a month before the date of the flash (April 29). Bummer dude.

But then tonight there's a twist. When Demetri is finally reunited with his fiancee Zoe (Union), she's dying to tell him about her vision. And when she does it's a doozy. (If by doozy I mean cute but a bit boring and not very clear at all). She tells him that she saw their wedding day on a beautiful beach in Hawaii. Awww! She's gorge dude. Sorry, back on track... She's all excited, 'cause it means they picked a date and their gettin' hitched.



Demetri asks "and you saw me?"

She answers "of course. Didn't you see me?"

He lies "Yes."

He didn't see that. We know he didn't see that. For a second I was like, maybe he just had his eyes closed. Look, I'm grasping at straws people, I know!

But here's the thing. She didn't see his ass either as far as I'm concerned. I mean, seriously, that vision was fuzzy as hell and the dude she marrying is still ridiculously far away on that beach. I mean, really? You're 100% sure you saw Demetri, Zoe? Is your eyesight that good? I guess...

After this, sexy lips Agent Noh struggles with how to deal with this information. Is he dead, like the woman on the phone said, or is he on a beach getting married?

And then it happens, the scene that sparked this random ass review: While working on the investigation, Noh ends up at a future (mess of a) Customs officer's house. The guy, lovable pothead that he is, totally has a bong in full view and begs Demetri not to rat him out. He then admits that Noh has the power to make his future come true.

So of course I yelled "Don't make his future come true!" (and then promptly realized that I was talking to a tv and totally need to get a life) because well, if you can change one thing that means you can change another. And if you can change the future then, if Agent Noh is dead by the blackout, maybe there's a way to stop that from happening. Right? Yea?

Why didn't I think of this before?

Ultimately, we don't yet know what Agent Noh does, or doesn't do, about the Customs Agent but I'm left wondering why no one in Flashforward is rebelling against their future. Everyone seems to be hastening the future to come (because they're happy at the outcome) or cowering in fear of it. But not one person so far is actively trying to change it. Why? Wouldn't you want to try and "fix" the future if you were separated from your wife or, you know, DEAD? I would. So why is no one in Flashforward-land?

This is my plot dilemma: Is Flashforward ignoring basic human instincts? Or am I overestimating them?

Would you fight?

But yea, then there's the whole sci-fi thing about knowing the future: You know, if you rebel, you actually create the future that you're trying to avoid. Or some other crazy shit...

Maybe I'm jumping the gun a bit. The last scene might offer some clues about what's happening next. While at first Demetri was creeped out by the idea that he and Zoe planned to marry on "D-Day," by the end of the episode he's done a 180 and decided to make it official. He says they should book it and ultimately gives into her blackout vision and possibly his death.

"I want us to make our future happen," he says. I gush.

And while at first it sounds like he's essentially willing his murder to happen. Maybe he's not. Maybe, just maybe, he's saying damn my (possible) murder, we're going to believe in your dream.

And that's really fucking sweet in my opinion.

But still...

Community- The Asian Spanish Teacher

NBC's new half hour comedy Community hasn't received too much hype, even though it airs in the channel's coveted Thursday night comedy block. Personally I only thought to give it a try because Joel McHale is funny, but just as soon as I decided to watch it, I forgot about it completely. But I happened to catch Yvette Nicole Brown's interview on The Wendy Williams Show and promptly set my dvr. And thank god I did, because this shit is hilarious.

Sadly, I then immediately forgot that about it again (am I too young for senility?) and missed the second episode. But I was lucky enough to catch the show on Bravo thanks to NBC's media domination. And if it was possible to top the introduction of Abed, the Indian dude with Aspergers, and Chevy Chase as creepy older hippy Pierce who has a bit of a thing for Shirley (Brown), they did so with this little nugget of fabulousness. Meet Senor Chang (Ken Jeong), the Asian Spanish Teacher:

In his first appearance Senor Chang lays it down, getting right to the heart of your Asian stereotypes and the supposed incongruity of having an Asian man teaching Spanish. Because I can't find the clip anywhere anymore (damn NBC and their copyright protections!) I've decided to transcribe it for you.... Seriously! It's that good.

Every once in a while a student will come up to me and ask Senor Chang, why do you teach Spanish? They say it just like that. Why do you teach Spanish? Why you? Why not math? Why not photography? Why not martial arts? I mean surely it must be in my nature to instruct you in something that's ancient and secret like oh building a wall that you can see from outer space. Well I'll tell you why I teach Spanish. It is none of your business ok? Now I don't wanna have any conversations about what a mysterious inscrutable man I am. [plays with imaginary long, white beard] oheheheheheohohohohoh I am a spanish genius. En espanol my nickname is el tigre chino [pretending to bite Shirley's neck] because my knowledge will bite her face off. So don't question Senor Chang or you'll get bit, ya bit, ya bit!... Ok, Friday manana...

At first I wasn't sure where this monologue was going and I am a bit lost on where it ended up. But the more I listened the more I realized that Senor Chang was blowing my mind. All of a sudden, he was killing me softly and I was on the floor dying laughing. "Why not karate?" The "mysterious" Asian man... oh sweet lord in heaven, you like me and this proves it!

Senor Chang's outburst says a lot about how we understand race, nationality and language. I've talked about this before but this dude is so funny that I had to do it again.

Why do his students get all confuddled about having an Asian Spanish teacher? Well, you know... he's Asian first of all. Shouldn't he be teaching Japanese or Cantonese or, you know, some Asian language?
That has got to be one of the dumbest sentences I've ever had to write just because it requires looking at the world with such massive blinders I don't know how you don't run into multiple walls.

But also because comments like these presume that only Asian people speak Asian languages, only Latinos speak Spanish and only someone of a particular racial group should teach that language. This also supposes that you've never looked around you and seen what different kinds of people lay claims to what it means to be an American. And everyone from Norcal knows that when you're in high school you have two foreign language options, Spanish or French. And if you know like I know, Spanish is just barely a foreign language in some parts of the U.S.

So douche... why Senor Chang?

Why the FUCK NOT?

...must watch...

I am an admitted tv hound. I love tv more than I love most personal interactions. Hell I can probably track all of the most interesting/monumental changes of my life to a tv show.

TV rules my world and my friends are totally starting to catch on.

And... because of that I've decided to compile a list of must-see tv... No not that bullshit nbc two-hour block. Like tv that I love. TV that I crave. TV that I would actually buy on dvd...

So heeeeere we go: (oh yea, and I don't cross reference... deal)

Sci-Fi or syfy (dumbest move ever!):

Roswell
Smallville*
Supernatural*
Firefly
Buffy the Vampire Slayer/Angel
Moonlight
Night Stalker
Battestar Galactica
Stargate
Blade: The Series
New Amsterdam
Journeyman
The 4400
Dead Like Me (skip the straight to dvd movie and come up with your own ending... trust me)
Dark Angel
Eureka* (it's getting a bit hinky now, but it started off great)

Blackalicious:

Living Single
In Loving Color
A Different World
Half & Half
Girlfriends (right up until Toni Childs leaves... nothing worth knowing after that)
Noah's Arc

Dramedy:

Sex and the City
Californication*
The United States of Tara*
Big Shots (they just won't give a brother a chance... um, or a sista. whatever)
Leverage*
Veronica Mars

As Opposed to Total Drama Island (my niece's fave show):


The Wire
Six Feet Under
Big Love*
The L Word
Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip
Law & Order*
Burn Notice*
The Closer*
ER (right to the end... don't you judge me!)
One Tree Hill* (until they get rid of Leyton and I get rid of them)
Sleeper Cell
House*

Laugh your arse off:

Psych*
Pushing Daisies
30 Rock*
Arrested Development
Chapelle Show (season 1 only)
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia*
Lucky Louie (sometimes one season is more than enough)

Cheerio! or They Came From Across the Pond:

Hotel Babylon
Green Wing
Teachers
Are You Being Served?
Bad Girls
Black Books
Skins*
Doctor Who*
Torchwood*
Footballers' Wives (too dishy to miss)
Gavin & Stacey*
Hex
Spooks/MI-5*
Red Dwarf
Spaced

Animatrix'd:

Daria
Aeon Flux
Fraggle Rock
Futurama*

Some Weird Undefinable Shit:

Carnivale
Rome

* indicates a show still on air... it's more than a little telling/sad that all of the shows in Blackalicious are dunzo *sigh*

Flashforward- review

GREAT FUCKING CAST! No seriously, I'm not exaggerating.

• John Cho
• Courtney B. Vance
• Alex Kingston
• Lee Thompson Young (where the hell has he been hiding?)
• Jack Davenport (random as all hell)

And this is just a few. AND this is only a few of the people we saw this week. In the previews I spotted Gabrielle Union, Dominic Monaghan and Gina Torres. I mean wtf abc? This is a crazy good cast that I've loved all over the place elsewhere! Kudos to you bitches...

Oh yea, um, the story's interesting. No really it is. It's just that if you like cheap, quick thrills, this show is not for you. The storyline will unfold slowly over the season. I like shows like that AS LONG as the payoff is worth it. I actually think this one might deliver. *fingers crossed*

the forgotten- review

Dear Rupert Penry Jones,

First of all, you're hot and I loved you in Spooks and you're ridiculously sexy in Persuasion *squee* Sorry, moving on...

I just saw the first episode of "the forgotten." You know, that show that axed you after an unaired pilot when some douchey focus group said that you and the female lead weren't so hot (she wasn't, you're always steamy). And then they replaced you with Christan Slater fresh off of the nbc cancellation of his pretty good "My Own Worst Enemy." Remember? Um, well I saw the first epi and I would like to say... don't feel bad. This show's going to get canceled soon anyway. I mean maybe not real soon, but soon.

 Don't get me wrong, it's a good show and it definitely has potential. But it's one of those that takes the whole finding lost people premise a bit too seriously so that it somehow morphs into this self-righteous downer that you watch at first but then just start recording and only watch grudgingly when your dvr is full, not 'cause you like it or anything, just so that you can have the pleasure of deleting them. *cough*Warehouse 13*cough* It's just really not that serious.

However, I will say that Christian Slater wasn't that bad (even though you would have been better!) and Rochelle Aytes was gorgeous... um and a good actress too. I'm hoping for  a little hook up with those characters but I'm a realist, so optimism seems naive. Also, if they do hook up I'll always think of you Rupert because you're amazing and rock my socks. And I'm adult enough to admit that this letter just took a strange turn into the creepy...

Sorry,

-nicole-

Old Hats- reviews

Heroes: Snooze, but apparently it's still cool to watch Claire try and kill herself. And the little snippets of Sylar are always awesome. Black folk... sigh... maybe next time.

House: I guess, although I did just read an article that Jennifer Morrison is leaving and has already filmed her last episode. Isn't it sad that I don't even care about her character anymore? Oh, I guess I, uh, see. That was possibly a good decision for you then Jen...

Castle: After a show survives its first season, they're not out of the woods just yet. Everyone wonders if it can keep up the momentum. Some shows have such an amazing first season that crappy fans and critics tear apart its sophomore effort (r.i.p. Pushing Daisies). So the heat is on for Castle. I have to say that the premiere wasn't that bad. I mean I couldn't have cared two shits about the person who died, it was a bit... far fetched for me. But I liked it. I appreciated the Castle/Beckett angst. All of my favorite characters were there and still funny. Maybe not as funny as last season, but I love Nathan Fillion enough to be sure that I'll warm to them, just like last season.

It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia: The season premiere was so decidedly unfunny that I was nervous about epi 2. Thankfully the gang made up for their stumble last week. All I have to say is Soul Asylum never sounded so good Sweet Dee!

Law & Order: Last season I realized that every single part of that show made me happy. The cases, the actors, the storylines. It was all better than it'd been in years. The premiere was just as amazing. Seriously, McCoy fucking indicted former Vice President Cheney. It's like the L&O team are fucking reading my mind! Imaginary Christmas came early this year yall...

...some reviews...

Hello again,

So the first week of fall premieres is over and well... I was a bit underwhelmed. I was so generally bored that I've spent some time writing reviews for this blog instead of, you know, actually paying too close attention to these shows...

But first, a disclaimer:

• 2 hour premieres are so unbelievably unnecessary it hurts. They hurt. I hurt. My tv hurts. I almost cried. I'm a super tv nerd and I never missed a show enough to NEED a 2 hour premiere. Especially not if the episode is weird or so boring it makes you want to tear your eyes out... I can sit through a mediocre hour show that's a little boring (I watched all of last season's Private Practice didn't I?) but 2 hours just sends me over the top. Or into a coma. *dedicated with a hung head to House, Grey's Anatomy and Heroes...smh..*
• 2 hours season finales are still totally awesome... 
  

...where's my clicker?...

Well kids, it's that time again. A new fall premiere season is upon us. For those that don't know I'm a serious tv hound/couch potato and this is my favorite time of the year. If I celebrated Christmas, fall premieres would put that sappy holiday to shame!

So, in the spirit of full disclosure here is a list of shows that I'm excited about (and some that I'm really not):

Returning

Heroes- yea, it's confusing and they keep killing off all of the Black people and the Asians are woeful stereotypes but I fucking love Hiro goddammit! ... don't look at me. I'm so ashamed... :-(

House- the white person is the druggie? sign me up!

Lincoln Heights- one word: Chassie. all my tween/teen girls know what I'm talking about... yea. yea... (still ashamed)

Supernatural- technically started last week, but whatever, still excited. Dean- need I say more? thought not!

Cold Case- old mysteries, Tracie Thoms/Anthony LaPaglia... it is what it is.

Castle- Nathan Fillion. that is all.

Smallville- I don't have to explain myself to you!

It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia- I love this show. the season premiere was not amazing. I'm excited, but wary...

Law & Order- last season was ridiculous. I never thought I'd say this but Anthony Anderson is a really good actor... gasp!

Medium- fucking cbs nbc. how do you cancel Medium!? it's on nbc cbs now.

Californication- if you don't know you betta ask somebody.

Dollhouse- I thought most of season 1 was a bit... meh, but it's Joss Whedon so I'm hoping they will have fixed the kinks.

Lie to Me- ridiculous!

Better off Ted- one of those dry humor, man breaks the fourth wall shows that works for me... I don't like the Office... even though I wanted to.

New Kids on the Block

the forgotten- actually I don't know how to feel about this one. how do you replace Rupert Penry Jones with Christian Slater? fucking Americans.

Eastwick- another one I'm ambivalent about but I liked the movie so we'll see.

The Vampire Diaries- the books sound atrocious but I was pleasantly surprised by the pilot so I'm giving it a shot.

Melrose Place- I was actually not a fan of the original but the first two episodes weren't bad. besides there's a black girl. there's only one, but sometimes that's all they give us so I have to make it work...

Flashforward- I actually kept running into the descriptions for this one and said no, hell no, repeatedly. some smart exec, however, made me turn my head with the announcement that John Cho was in it. I still said no, but I was willing to listen. then they made me turn around completely: Gabrielle Union was cast on the show? no, no, you will not break me down, goddamn you! and I was holding out pretty strong all summer until I heard that... John Cho and Gabrielle Union's characters were a couple... fucking abc. I'm watchin', I'm watchin'!

Glee- who knew? I'm hooked.

Community- Joel McHale... nuff said...

Shows I Gave Up On/Not Even Trying

One Tree Hill- no Leyton?! No Nicole...

Gossip Girl*- I just can't keep track and the CW doesn't do enough reruns... maybe on dvd... maybe... and where the fuck are the black people? this show has the Friends-itis...

Cougar Town- no. (on a sidenote: did anyone besides me watch Dirt? now that show was crazy)

The Beautiful Life- i tried. the premise was tired as hell.

CSI:NY- i don't know what happened. i used to really love this show. maybe it's just too sleek for me? *shrugs shoulders*

Parks and Recreation- horrible. absolutely horrible. and it really shouldn't be! amy poehler. rashida jones. wtf happened!?

CSI- actually, I gave up on it not 'cause it wasn't good it's just that thursday is a busy (tv) night for me... it's up against some pretty tough contenders... oh larry fishburne... I tried! I tried!

Fringe*- this show was amazing but then fox kept fucking with it's schedule and I lost interest

Ghost Whisperer- Andrea.

Southland*- again I tried. I was not impressed.

Sanctuary- who knew a webseries could be better than the shit they put on tv? I am humbled... and not tuning in.

NCIS- one day I looked up and realized that I couldn't figure out if I'd already seen this episode because EVERY FUCKING NCIS EPISODE IS THE SAME unless it's a season finale... over it!

Never Tried But Maybe on Netflix...?

The Mentalist- my mom likes it. but in my mind simon should be with sanaa on my tv screen... I might have gotten a bit attached to something new...

Sons of Anarchy- I've heard good things but... maybe on netflix.

CSI: Miami- maybe there's just been too much soup criticism of the show (oh horatio) but they had megalyn echikunwoke on it last season so all of a sudden I have a new determination to see what's going down... i'm nothing if not predictable.

Dexter*- technically I saw the first season, but something about the second season never clicked with me... I'll put it on my queue though... why not?

So, these are my obsessions... what are you watching this season?

*- indicates a show that I'm willing to consider for the netflix queue.

...reading is sexy...

Books I love/am reading/will read

be forewarned: I have very varied tastes...

Fiction
Bastard Out of Carolina by Dorothy Allison*

Persuasion by Jane Austen*

The Street by Anne Petry

Jane Eyre by Charlotte Bronte*

Their Eyes Were Watching God by Zora Neale Hurston*

Girl, Interrupted by Susana Kaysen*

Wicked by Gregory Maguire

The Witching Hour by Anne Rice

The Namesake by Jhumpa Lahiri*

The Da Vinci Code by Dan Brown

Non-Fiction/History

A People on the Boil: Reflections on Soweto by Harry Mashabela

Ella Baker & the Black Freedom Movement by Barbara Ransby

Assata: An Autobiography by Assata Shaku

Black Power: Radical Politics and African American Identity by Jeffrey O.G. Ogbar

Claudia Jones: A Life in Exile by Marika Sherwood

The Body Project: An Intimate History of American Girls by Joan Jacobs Brumberg

Feministy Things

Scum Manifesto by Valeries Solanas

Black British Feminism: A Reader ed. Heidi Safia Mirza

Talking Back by bell hooks

Reading Now

Afro-Future Females ed. Marlene S. Barr

Summers at Castle Auburn by Sharon Shinn

A Bone to Pick by Charlaine Harris

The Nawal El Saadawi Reader

The River by Edward Hooper

For Their Triumphs and For Their Tears by Hilda Bernstein

On the come-up... eventually

Kindred by Octavia Butler

The Lovely Bones by Alice Sebold

What Looks Like Crazy on an Ordinary Day by Pearl Cleage

Daughters of the Dust by Julie Dash

White Rising: The 1922 Insurrection and Racial Killing in South Africa by Jeremy Krikler

Unaccustomed Earth by Jhumpa Lahiri

Living for the Revolution by Kimberly Springer

The Montgomery Bus Boycott and the Women Who Started It by Jo Ann Robinson

Coming of Age in Mississippi by Anne Moody

Telling Histories ed. Deborah Gray White

All the Women are White, All the Blacks are Men, But Some of Us are Brave by Gloria Hull, Patricia Bell Scott & Barbara Smith

Confessions of an Ugly Stepsister by Gregory Maguire

I also read a lot of fiction online... some of which is better than stuff Amazon recommends... so if you're into popular fiction check out The Chamber. (My favorite authors are TokenBlackGirl and BlackMamba, but there are lots of good people writing on there...)

And because I love yall, I'm posting my shelfari bookshelf on the site. So keep track of my reading and maybe even join and be my friend (hint: Jean).

* denotes a damn good film adaptation... I liked Tom Hanks and The Da Vinci Code, but Angels & Demons ruined it for me...

...and we're B(l)ack... or the Disney Corporation doesn't care about Black people... part 2

You would think that with all of the storms weathered in the creation process Disney's new movie The Princess and the Frog would be a genius, racially sensitive, illuminating but lighthearted fantasy for children to enjoy. I mean they did get the fabulous Anika Noni Rose to voice her. And...well, um... maybe, kids like all kinds of things like... playing in sand and some even enjoy bugs. But, if you're going to be the adult shepherding tots to see that movie... watch out!

Seriously, I'm not even joking, let's consider the trailer. The first time I saw this I thought "Wait a minute, that didn't just happen, lemme watch it again." And the second time I saw it I thought, "Ugh, maybe the girls can just go see it without me or, even better, they won't want to see it." Now, the last was actually really hard for me to say. I love my nieces and I love animated movies so pair them up... (We just went to see Up and I completely cried, and laughed, and stole some of Sierra's candy!) But this looks a hot mess and I'm not the only one who thinks so.

Some people are complaining because the princess turns into a frog and others are saying get over it. I can definitely see both sides of the issue. As a person commented on another site, if she turns into a frog and stays that way for most of the movie how is that better than the Lion King. Touche my friend! And the answer is that it's not. I mean, part of the outrage with that old chain email was that Disney seemed to equate Black people with animals and so it would seem that maybe they haven't shaken that off.

But then on the other hand, one could effectively argue that what Disney is doing is trying to revamp a tired (and let's face it, not that interesting) fairy tale, where the prince is turned into a frog who can only be turned back by the kiss of a princess, blah, blah... true love! So, by turning her into a frog, Disney is saying no maybe there's another lesson to be learned, something more for her to see. Like maybe, being a frog is how she was really meant to be and her prince is the one who loves her just as she is even when the sun goes down and his donkey.... wait a minute. That's Shrek!

So... maybe it's not so inventive after all...

Oh and then there's the voodoo. Come the frak on, Disney! Throw me a chicken bone... oops. This is such a mess. The villain in the movie is a voodoo priest (Papa Legba?) who's probably/obviously cursed the prince and is scheming to marry the princess (wait, was that the plot of Aladdin?) and his schemes are foiled by... I don't know... true love... and Christianity? Why is it that when white people think of Black religion they think of voodoo (and Baptist church ladies with big hats, huge digression!) and when they think of voodoo they think of dark magic. This is so played out for a variety of reasons.

First, voodoo is not, I repeat not, dark magic and if they're going to talk about it I would suggest that one of those trifling story editors do some research. Voodoo began, like Candomble and other related religions throughout the Caribbean, as a clear response to the dehumanizing effects of slavery. Those who practiced voodoo did so as a way to hold on to those cultural and religious practices that their enslavers attempted to take from them. So if you're going to deal with voodoo, you damn well better deal with slavery and the brutal racism that made it a necessity. But oh wait, Disney couldn't even get Pocahontas' husband right (easily accessible in pretty much ALL American history books), so the amount of time it would take to read a book on voodoo (a day, or less if you just read the damn introduction!) apparently couldn't be spared.

But that doesn't mean that I think that everything about this movie is some nefarious plot. The movie IS set in New Orleans during the Jazz Age (late nineteenth century into the 1920s), so I'm just going to excuse all the dancing Black folk. It just be's that way sometimes.

But here's what I'm not excusing. Someone on another site talked about the use of Black vernacular in Disney movies and how offensive it is and it brought back the old pain: Dumbo! I grew up loving Dumbo. I wanted a pet elephant (who could fly), I knew all of the songs and let's face it, that movie is wonderful. Well at least I thought it was until I was in the double digits. I was maybe 12 or 13 when Dumbo came on tv and I was so excited I settled in with a snack to watch. And I cried when Dumbo lost his mom. And I awwed at how all the animated little animals were freaking adorable even the little elephants who, I now know thanks to the Discovery channel are not cute at birth. In fact, no animals are cute at birth 'cause they're covered in goo! EW! (I'm including humans in that, btw.) Anyway, I digress, so I laughed and laughed when that spunky little mouse (from the NY?) got Dumbo so drunk that he woke up in a tree (that's so not legal right?). But then my mouth dropped when he met the crows.

Ooh I used to love those bad boys when I was a kid and knew all the words, but as an (almost) teenager they were not fun and all I could think was what.the.mother.fuck?

"I be done seen 'bout everything when I see an elephant fly!"

And did you know that the lead bird was named Jim Crow? I shit you not! Those are some jive ass turkeys! (I can't believe people said stuff like that...hehehe)

Look, like I said, I loved Dumbo and I also loved Peter Pan, so when I grew up and realized just how horrible they portrayed people of color, especially without offering any sort of alternatives, I was hurt. And it's this pain that I want to keep my nieces from. It's sad that there are so many movies that I grew up loving that I just can't bear to watch now (wat'chu say Shirley Temple?). Or those others that I've decided to ignore the lack of people of color and questionable images because... well I mean... it really could have been worse (oh Hayley Mills, I think you tried to make up for it on Saved by the Bell, with their one Black cast member).

There are lot of problems with this movie for me.

I have a general problem with movies that are historical (as pretty much all Disney movies are) and shit on that history. And this has nothing to do with my being a historian and everything to do with the fact that I respect people enough as HUMAN BEINGS with feelings, emotions and desires to not try and deprive them of a full and rich history. And you can yell all you want that this isn't what Disney's trying to do and this isn't their job, but when you're talking about kids that's exactly their job. My niece doesn't get European history in the second grade, but she damn sure understands that if there's a Queen of England, there damn sure better be some princes and princesses floating around her CASTLE! These movies convey to children what we can not; rich visuals of the world that surrounds them and that came before. So when you make a movie like Pocahontas and you tie that character into commercials about preserving the land and forest conservation (I remember those PSAs) you can't say that Disney doesn't have a message. And if Disney does have an agenda you have to look at their movies as a whole. And as a whole I'm disgusted.

So I finished this trailer on a sour note. That poor old woman near the end who bellows "dis gone be good!" pretty much does it for me. No ma'am I'm not sure that it is...

So what's the final verdict? What have I concluded at the end of this (hours long?) tirade. Two things. First, I'm almost certainly going to see this movie with my nieces because they're little Black girls who deserve to see a Black princess and know that girls with brown skin can be beautiful too. (If that isn't the message at the end of this movie I am going to go off!) Second, even though I've had an almost 20 year feud with Barbie dolls, and their generic knock offs (I'm looking at you Black Barbie and Bratz!) I'm going to make sure that the girls get a Tiana doll if they want one because one of the reasons I hated Barbie was because she was white (and I would never look like her) or the Black best friend with no real storyline and looked just like Barbie (but chocolate!). So they have the chance to have a doll with a (better be) fully developed storyline who isn't the forgotten best friend, or the token Black girl in a sea of white faces (maybe there's a silent Asian girl to keep her company huh Gossip Girl?) and I won't deprive them of the super expensive doll to go with it. Because, Tiana, this first Black Disney princess is a star!

And when it's all over I'll make sure that I ask them what they thought about the movie and the characters (silently searching for any hint of damage) and whenever they're ready I'll talk to them about our family's history in Louisiana, and I'll buy them jazz cds when they're cool teenagers rebelling against the top 40 music their friends listen to, and when they're old enough I'll give them books that present intelligent and interesting discussions of Black people in this country (and elsewhere) and I'll try and mitigate as much of the damage as this movie and all of the other media images of Black people have caused. I'll do what the adults in my life did for me and what I hope their forebears did with them.

And maybe that's the real tragedy...

... a long time coming, but maybe we shoulda waited a little bit longer...

So a few years ago I got one of those massively forwarded emails from god knows who that was apparently a letter that a (Black) grandmother sent to Disney after taking her grandchildren to Disneyland (or was it DisneyWorld, whatever). Essentially, the grandmother wanted to know why there weren't any Black Disney princesses. The company's response was that Disney had tried to represent all of the continents with their movies, so the U.S. had (among many many others) Pocahontas (they were trying to make a point), Asia had Mulan (I liked that movie, but the sequel was horrible) and Africa had The Lion King... hahahahaha (I laugh because I hurt)

Now, I don't know if this was real or just the product of someone's amazing imagination, but it sounds so believable. I mean, let's not play the game, Disney has a horrible, horendous, atrocious history of blatantly racist cartoons.

I mean you can not understand how my face fell when I sat down to watch Peter Pan with my niece Sierra and had to snatch the dvd out of the machine because of the red Indians with big noses ready to scalp somebody! My niece was disturbed at first but you know, she was three, she got over it when I put Cinderella in.

I wish I could say that was the end of the whole situation but it wasn't. Sierra has an intense love of all things Disney princess, which grosses me out (it's all so pink! and frilly!) but we indulge because I believe that if she can make a decision on her own she should be allowed that freedom (within reason). So when she started school and her mother asked her what backpack she wanted, she chose the princess bag. That night however, I got a phone call from my sister-in-law telling me that Jasmine was gone! She has a sister named Jasmine so I was momentarily confused but eventually caught onto the fact that she meant Princess Jasmine (from Aladdin fame, best Disney soundtrack ever! Peabo is that you?). Somehow, overnight it seemed, Disney had taken Jasmine off of the Disney princess merchandise which left Cinderella, Ariel, Snow White, Belle and Aurora (that's her name?) from Sleeping Beauty.

We were confused to put it midly, not least because not all of those chicks weren't princesses, or at least they weren't before they married the dude who saved them from some generic misadventure (god I hate these movies now). In fact, as far as I can reckon, the only one of them that was a princess was Ariel. So why these princesses and not... say... Jasmine, Mulan and Pocahontas...


Let's not play, we know what it was, even if that's not the official reason. Right from the beginning Pocahontas (a real princess) was only ever sometimes on the merch. Mulan also got the short shrift. And Jasmine (a princess as well) had been unceremoniously axed. This was all about 4 years ago and, to be honest, my 3 year old niece didn't care not one bit, if she even noticed. But we did (we being the adults meant to take care of her physically and emotionally). We realized how problematic it was for a little girl to crave white dolls, especially if she ONLY wanted the white dolls. So my sister became obsessed with finding Black dolls for her daughters and even branched out to those few Asian and Latina dolls (that's another post) so that the girls could have as many positive models of beauty as possible, because let's deal in the real, these are where our girls get their understandings of beauty from and for little girls of color that almost always, on some level, means that they understand beauty (outside of their family) to be white. (I realize this situation is immensely complex and not just about race but, like I said, another post.)

So a couple of years ago, I believe right after Katrina, Disney announced that there was going to be a new Disney movie, after a hiatus on Princess movies of about ten years if Mulan was the last movie (not counting craptastic, straight to dvd sequels and shorts). And Black folk were happy... and then really damn angry!

In the earliest drafts the first Black Disney princess was going to be a chambermaid named Mammy... I mean Maddy. hahahaha (again, it's hurts). And the first I heard the movie was going to be called The Frog Princess. People raised all kinds of hell! And thank god they did, because seriously Disney, wtf! I hope someone lost their job on that one, because that is no way to build a better relationship with the Black community! People who probably don't even care about this issue should have been ashamed on the company's behalf. Pathetic.

So Disney did an about face and has since changed the film's title to The Princess and the Frog and the princess is named Tiana (did they strike down Kameelah, cause I would have accepted that as well...)

Now I'm not following the whole issue, but the next controversy I heard about was that the prince was not going to be Black and it seems that no amount of hullabaloo would change this one. When the movie is released this fall/winter, Princess Tiana will be courted by Prince Naveen of the ambiguously raced, brown/sort of tan people with a name that I just can't place so he could be from anywhere just as long as you know that he's not white... and not Black... I guess...

At first glance I was like, whatever, what's the big deal. It's not like Disney hasn't gone interracial before (what's up Pocahontas and John Smith from the completely inaccurate and problematic 1995 movie). Besides, I've got my own issues with the way that interracial couples are (not) shown on tv, especially those concerning Black women, so at first I was all for it. But then, while googling the controversy for this post I came across a yahoo answers question about the situation. (Seriously, I don't know if you needed to post a question about it, just get some friends and take them out for coffee!) And some lady, who I assume was white based on her avatar, made a really great point. Just as there's never been a Black Disney princess there's never been a Black prince. Damn! That lady messed my whole analysis up, because she's right. So I wondered, why is no one as upset about Naveen's ambiguous, but not Black-ness as they were about Mammy... uh Maddy (oops)?

I think the answer is clear and sad all at the same time. I would imagine that most of the people complaining about this are the mothers (or aunts!) of little girls who love these movies. Little boys are not the intended audience, even if they will, whether they want to or not, see this film. (My nephew's the baby, he will probably have watched all of the Disney princess line by the time he's 5!) Does the muted outrage about Naveen mean that we don't care that our boys have positive role models in children's films? To be honest I can't even name an animated movie with a Black male lead (but again, I've got nieces who can be really girly, so it could be my blind spot covering most things male). It seems clear to me that if we're going to be outraged at Disney let's not stop halfway, let's take it there. Just as Nala aint good enough to represent Black women, neither is Simba, both of whom were, to my intense irritation, voiced by white actors! (Moira Kelly, Matthew Broderick and Jonathan Taylor Thomas) Seriously! yall got Ming Na-Wen but couldn't think of two Black/African actors to voice the leads in your most popular movie? (to be fair though, Niketa Calame voiced young Nala and she's Black). But still, whatever...

to be continued...

...a beginning of sorts...

So... hello there. I'm Nicole. I'd imagine that if you're here you are one of a few things:

• family
• friends... probably Alicia!
• lost

Either way, welcome.

Let's get to know eachother. I am a(n):

1. historian
2. grad student
3. writer
4. reader
5. blogger
6. daughter
7. aunt
8. (mediocre) friend
9. intermittently witty
10. loopy
    

I love to blog.  I have another blog with my friend Jean, check it out if you haven't: Don't Oppress My Ovaries. That blog is amazing but it doesn't fulfill all of my needs. Well, that's not entirely true. It's really that my needs are changing.

I've realized a few things this year, the most important being that I really don't like my profession. Being a historian bores the holy hell out of me. Sadly, after devoting the past 6 years to it, it is more than likely going to be my day job or at least the job that I can always fall back on.

But it's not really the work that I want to do. Theoretically being a historian should be perfect for me because reading and writing make me happy. So what's the problem? I've narrowed it down to content and style. History books make me sleepy, which is great when I'm going through one of my spells of insomnia, not so great when I'm sitting in a super trendy coffee shop with emaciated dirty hipsters talking about sneakers at the table next to me.

So what does catch my interest? Plots. Readable writing. Interesting characters. Magic. Witches. Vampires. Love Stories. Mysteries. Fiction. Popular fiction.

I'm considering a career change.

I'm writing fiction. This is my first experience at writing creatively since college and writing fiction stories since I was a pre-teen (seriously). I've got a great friend who is also amazing enough to serve as my editor and she's been integral to making this work.

So what's this blog? I'm thinking that ...an open book... will be me talking about... well, you know, books and what i'm reading/have read/want to read, reviews, suggestions but more too. I love popular culture, music, movies, tv... especially tv, so I'm also going to post comments/critiques about those things as well.

I also love talking/arguing/writing about race and gender. It isn't always easy to integrate this with my love of fiction, but I'm going to do it here because it's fun. And I'm a nerd. And stuff like this makes me happy...

And lastly, when it's time, I look forward to creating a cohort of people who come here to talk about books and pop culture so it's not just me having a creepy one-sided conversation with myself only to justify spending too much time at my computer... um, because you know, there's a very good chance that that's what happening here...